The Death of the Pickup Artist

This has been making the rounds-

http://www.robjudge.net/2010/10/the-death-of-the-pickup-artist-a-eulogy/

Being terminally shy I never wanted to make any cold approaches as a young man. I had friends though who wanted to and they dragged me along. Of the ones I remember, they were mostly pretty awful. This thing game promoters blithely refer to as the “bitch shield” is a serious thing. Getting a negative, hostile person to respond positively to you is a big barrier to cross. There are people who make a good living doing this but they are few and far between.

I think this stuff has to be organic, or, as the PUAs like to say, “congruent”- it has to fit with your overall personality and mood. “Just being yourself” is hardly the answer- but you have to be some version of yourself, the best version, the most relaxed and breezy version.

At the end of “The Game” Strauss relates a time he goes out to a bar in Hollywood, tries a variety of openers and finds all the women are completely familiar with them, they can finish his sentences. The women, or the venues, or the neighborhood has been burned out. Not surprising, since if you run numerous boot camps within a short walking distance the word is going to get around, even in a large anonymous city with a lot of turnover.

This is now a part of popular culture, “featured” as they say on VH-1, so women are going to be familiar with it. Particularly women who spend any time in bars.

Why bars and nightclubs are promoted for this I don’t know. True people from 21 to 25 do hook up there. But it’s the most brutal environment possible, and unless you are an experienced player with a pimp’s heart you are going to get worked over there. If you are you still face the problems outlined by Assanova and will do worse than you would elsewhere.

Going back to Susan Walsh’s post on rejection, rejection is not, as her pop psychologists tell you, helpful. Our central nervous systems are hard-wired against this. There are exceptions, but while you need to take risks, and suffer some rejection and failure, but only in small, manageable doses. If you’re in a low state a bad experience can fuck you up for a long time.