My Brain

I got hurt a couple weeks ago and I have been working a crappy temp job so I have not felt much like posting.

I was going to tough it out as I knew a doctor wasn’t going to do anything for me but give me oxycodone, which I don’t like to take. I broke down eventually, because I told my foreign girlfriend about it ans she insisted I see a doctor, and was given something called tramadol, which has psychoactive effects as well- it acts as a serotin and norphrenin reuptake inhibitor.

I felt pretty good after this. Part of it was relief at getting medical attention- they were quite nice to me at the emergency room. And I suppose part of it was chemical. I have been thinking about how to improve my thinking, but the truth is for me negative thinking is reality. The truth is my life sucks in many ways, has for a long time and will likely continue to suck for the foreseeable future.

Negative thinking gets a bad rap, but it has its place. For some people, like salesmen, positive thinking is necessary to survive. Salesmen get a lot of negative feedback all the time and if they didn’t think positively they would go nuts. I have been a salesman and couldn’t deal with it. On the other hand positive thinking is dangerous in many activities. Accountants and mechanics have to look for and fix problems- they can’t assume everything is going to be OK.

Human relations though require more positive than negative thinking. All I can think of is I need to blast my brain with positive things to outweigh the negative. The brain is just protein and chemicals, and some management of it should be possible.

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12 Responses to My Brain

  1. Sheila Tone says:

    In addition to the oxy, or instead? Why on earth would you turn down codies? You can always save them for later or offer them to female visitors.

    I’m surprised you’re not already on an SSRI, actually. Some of the sexual issues you describe are often side-effects of those.

    I checked in because I figured you’d have an opinion on the repeal of DADT. 😉 Hmmm.

    • raedawn says:

      poor thing, how did you get hurt?

      and I think your sex issues sound trauma-induced. Unless you’re making it up, we never know.

      Sheila is right bout the codone. Good idea for a single guy to keep a little something around.

      • Not going to say. My sex issues are religiously induced and trauma induced. I’m not sure how exchanging pills for sex works, is there some etiquette to this?

      • raedawn says:

        The “etiquette” is just the same as if you kept wine and liquor around for visitors, which I assume you do. Haven’t you ever had women ask you if you’ve “got anything to party with,” or something like that?

        The fact that it’s prescribed allows you to avoid looking like a druggie. You can conveniently remember, “Oh, hey, I’ve got some oxy in the cabinet from when I sprained my wrist…”

      • raedawn says:

        and damn, it’s too bad that stuff doesn’t work the same way for guys. If there were ever a man who should have roofie sex, it’s you.

      • raedawn says:

        but just to clarify codone should not make them pass out, even with wine, unless they take way too much of it.

    • I have had oxycodone prescribed a couple of time after minor operations. Its effect on me is, it changes excruciating pain into dull, throbbing pain, and makes me feel woozy. I know there is a market for such things but can you see me walking into a skeezy bar and asking somebody if they want to buy some pills?

      I have taken SSRIs in the past and they have totally shut me down sexually. I think my current sexual issues are partly age and partly not having a hot enough partner to make Mr. Happy happy, as a friend suggested.

      The short answer on repealing DADT is it’s a pretty dumb idea, but since you asked I’ll post more on it.

      • raedawn says:

        For anxiety, you should consider trying something in the benzo field if you haven’t already. Klonopin (clonazepan) is a good one because it’s light and purportedly not easy to get hooked on because it’s slow and long-acting, unlike Xanax which is fast-acting and therefore somehow more addictive according to doctors. It will not affect yoru sexual functioning (unless it makes you fall asleep).

        If you’re worried about straight-out asking for it for your anxiety (maybe you’re worried you’ll get funnelled into mental health services), they do prescribe it for restless leg syndrome as it’s an anti-convulsant.

  2. Steve says:

    You shot your eye out didn’t you?

  3. jwa says:

    Negative thinking can synergize with positive thinking.

    When you think of all the things that can go wrong, force them into order – e.g. by writing them down as a list of contingencies.

    Then, think about each bad possibility with confidence and resolve that whatever happens, you’ll be able to overcome the obstacle and continue to your goal.

    • I was doing that today. It also occured to me the really bad stuff that has happened to me has been totally out of left field, stuff I didn’t even imagine. So worrying can be kind of pointless.

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