Fat Women And The Omega

Obsidian asks why fat women get so much hate in the game community-

http://theobsidianfiles.wordpress.com/2009/12/25/why-do-plus-sized-women-get-so-much-hate-in-the-game-community/

My response was the negativity was not so much specifically directed at fat women as women in general, who do not behave as men would like them to. One thing men hope for from women is that they will maintain slim figures; a fat women is, at a glance, not doing that, and thus not behaving as a man would like her to. Her failure to conform to expectations is not necessarily worse than other kinds- such as being a bitch, lacking interest in or at least tolerance for male hobbies, unwillingness to engage in sex, or kinky sex, or sex of the frequency desired by a man, it is just more obvious.

The “game ” community overlaps to a great deal with the “mens’ rights” community, which is involved in protesting the bad treatment of men by the courts in divorce. These things should not, however, because they are two different things with completely different goals.

Imagine, if you will- as Rod Serling might say- a car salesman, involved in the business of selling used Toyotas. All that matters, as far as his immediate and personal well-being, is that he successfully sell used Toyotas. Time and energy spent complaining about how people won’t buy used Toyotas is completely wasted, beyond the somewhat self-destructive effect of temporarily making him feel better. He may see a young guy with a goatee come on the lot, and try to sell him a car. This guy is not a good prospect, so he leaves. He then sees and older woman, plainly dressed, or maybe a young woman of modest means with a child in tow. He stresses the reliability and reasonable cost of the vehicle, and she makes the purchase. Some people will buy used Toyotas, and some won’t. Commiserating in the break room over bad coffee with your fellow used Toyota salesmen about all the lousy lookie-lous who won’t buy won’t put any money in your pocket.

OK, we are only concerned here with what women do, not how we feel about it. Here’s another twist to it- a guy approaches a fat woman, maybe in a bar, maybe at a church picnic, and gets shot down. His pain is much worse than if she had been hot. After all, hot women are in demand, right? They get lots of offers, and are expected to be picky. Even if you don’t think your odds are good, you’ll go for it anyway, because she may be receptive that day or moment, and you might get lucky. If you go after a fat woman, on the other hand, you expect her to be receptive, because she does not have as many options. If she rejects you, it’s a double slap in the face- not only you don’t get what you want, she is telling you that you aren’t good enough for her.

Fat women, or other low desirability women, are in a difficult position. They have egos like anybody else. They like to think of themselves as desirable like anybody else. When a low desirability guy approaches, she is being reminded of her low status. If she accepts him, she ratifies her low status. If she rejects him, she confirms for herself that she is higher in dating status than he is.

Another ugly twist- the twists never end with this, do they? We’re talking about the highly valued and elusive bearded clam here. This shy, reclusive, and yet very tasty creature does not give itself up to the hunter easily. Should you want to gorge yourself on heaping servings of this delicacy, without getting various appendages rudely and painfully crushed in its hard shell, you must learn its many twists. The next ugly twist is when a fat or low desirability woman gets approached buy a guy of not-so-low desirability. That would seem like a good deal for her, right? And yet if she is angry at men, even at one specific man, or feeling insecure about her status, by rejecting this man, she believes she affirms that her status is higher than his.

Men are not terribly picky about what kind of woman they have a causal relationship or a one night stand with- particularly if their friends don’t know. They are going to be a lot more picky about what kind of woman they will publicly announce a relationship with, introduce to their friends, introduce to their family, or marry. A man ranks himself by the best woman he can get. Logically, a woman would rank herself by the best man she could get, but women are not logical. Some women will rank themselves by the best man they can reject.

R. Don Steele talks about this quite a bit in his books, how careful a man has to be not to let his prospect think she has achieved attracting a strong level of interest. If a woman wants psychological affirmation of her value as a woman, she doesn’t have to go out on a date with a man, she just has to get asked out on a date by a man. And, once he has asked her out, she can bump it up a notch in her mind by saying no!

Taking this apart carefully, if an 8 guy (however exactly women rank this, which is a lot more complicated than the way men do it) has asked her out she logically matches him in status somehow. However, if she rejects him, is she then better? I don’t think so; it only means she is hoping to get a better bid. If you offer a guy $5000 for his car or boat, and he declines to accept, it is not them worth $5500 until someone actually offers him that price.

Simply put, if a woman is objectively of low desirability, this is no guarantee she will accept interest from a man of similarly low desirability, essentially for reasons of ego.

The first thing a man must do in reference to women is cultivate an attitude of relaxed indifference. Partly because this is appealing to women; but primarily because you don’t really know what is going on in a woman’s mind and any strong reaction to her behavior, negative or positive, is unhelpful. Reacting to bad behavior only provides a reward for it, and good behavior may well be very fleeting. Never approach a woman with the idea her desirability status will make her more receptive to you.

Roissy makes another observation which complicates things, although I can’t find the actual post. He says fat women, being desperate, are more likely to throw themselves at alphas, who are sometimes willing to go for a no-effort lay. He says they then either 1) develop the idea they can somehow get an alpha to commit to a long-term relationship, or 2) commit themselves to a life of one-night stands with alphas, and make themselves unavailable to men of lower status. I have not actually observed this myself, but it’s plausible. As I have said the world is much kinder to omega women than it is to omega men- no woman needs a man, and there are entire industries that provide employment to omega women- healthcare and education most prominently, and various others. If a fat woman is poor and single, plenty of people will feel sorry for her; she doesn’t need a nice lifestyle for social respect or to attract men, so she can get by on a low wage. If she has a child, possibly resulting from a one night stand with an alpha, she gets help in various forms without social stigma. If a man is fat and poor, he will be regarded by society as a disgusting loser and shunned.

I have a bit of a fat fetish but I have never bagged a fat chick.

So if you can’t count on fat chicks as a source of sex when you are hard up where are you going to get it? Where ever you can, brother, where ever you can.

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157 Responses to Fat Women And The Omega

  1. monad says:

    Ecellent post, one cannot make concrete assumptions about any woman, as she can be capricious and rationalise anything to her psychological benefit (based on the current societal model of individualism and freedom being the highest import and anything is ‘possible’, ‘relative’ and one ‘can’t generalise’.

    I tend to like voluptuous women, but they still need to have an hourglass figure, with their fat evenly distributed. Some by way of their female hormone makeup are able to carry their weight well. Others, who have more fat on their abdomen (like men), are not attractive and are risking their health (as men are with a beer belly) due to risks of cardiovascular disease and diabetes etc.

  2. […] Omega Man – “The Danger of Popular Culture“, “Fat Women and the Omega” […]

  3. sestamibi says:

    This is so true. I once dated a very fat chick (not pleasingly zaftig, but quite obese). She came on to me initially (to which I was indifferent) and dumped me immediately after.

    It is always a source of amazement to me that even 1’s and 2’s have the same expectations as 9’s and 10’s, even without anything near the sexual market value to pull it off.

  4. krauserpua says:

    Good post. The reason I don’t like fat women is they are displaying a lifestyle choice in which they choose to be ugly in order to enjoy dissipation. This is worse in women than men because a woman’s SMV is about 90% physical. Therefore they are showing a much greater disrespect to themselves than an equivalent man.

    That’s the main reason. Second-order reasons are:
    – By eating herself out of dateability she has reduced the pool of hotness in which I bathe. That’s like throwing paint over the Mona Lisa.
    – Society tells fat women they are “real women” and they become belligerent.
    – Fat women are usually stupid.

  5. strikeforcemorituri says:

    Great post, I agree with everyone here in it’s suprising that fat chicks have standards too. Who would have thought?

  6. Sheila Tone says:

    Or maybe they’re just not stupid, and they *figure* you’re approaching them for the exact reason you are: as easy marks. No woman wants to be wanted out of desperation.

  7. Dude Man says:

    Fat people are unhealthy and are either weak-willed and undisciplined or do not care about the body and appearances.

    The many fat girls who dress up and make up, are not noble scientists disdaining earthly pleasures and focusing on something truly valuable, and some of them are downright dumb.

    Lack of discipline to prevent poor health is poor character in a free and equal person, and evidence of past unworthiness in a girl requiring discipline.

  8. Dee's says:

    I’ve often gotten more overt hostility from physically unattractive women (ugly, overweight, old) then from more attractive ones. A lot of less attractive women seem to carry a chip on their shoulders. Contrary to the stereotype that fat, ugly or unattractive women are beautiful on the inside, many seem to be mean and bitter.

  9. Andrew S. says:

    Living in the Midwest you see this kind of behavior a lot. The South and Midwest, being the fattest parts of this country, you have to always deal with women who you would think would be easy for pick-ups, but have the attiude of a South Beach 9.

    I blame millitary guys, because they are everywhere in the Midwest and usually in pretty good shape, and usually will fuck anything. Of course blacks and mexicans will fuck anything around here as well.

    If you are a woman, even if you are unattractive these are pretty good times. If you’re an unattractive male, you are shit out of luck.

  10. Candice says:

    I think you should not take rejection so personally – a lady whatever her appearance can only have a limited number of boyfriends and one at a time mostly, so she will need to decline approaches by many men.

    When I was dating, I was constantly getting requests for hook ups from men – I think they just asked every woman they came across hoping someone would say yes! It would be easy for them to over think my polite decline of their invitation – yet I simply do not do hook ups even if men think I am an easy target!

    Also, would you go out with a person that thought you were an easy target for seduction because of perceived excessive ugliness?

  11. Handfree says:

    This is a brilliant post, and many of the replies are surprisingly thoughtful. Frank discussions like this are rare gems indeed. I couldn’t agree with Andrew S more, and my buddies and I used to marvel at the inflated sense of self-worth and ‘tudes displayed by fat and/or ugly girls who lived near military bases. A sausage-fest is Nirvana for fatties. For some reason, I’m comforted knowing that I’m not the only guy who’s witnessed these phenomena.

  12. […] talked about this somewhat in an old post on approaching fat women. But I’ll talk about it more […]

  13. […] talked about this somewhat in an old post on approaching fat women. But I’ll talk about it more […]

  14. Why don’t you guys just stop being omegas – or go somewhere that even omegas can get hot chicks easily? I can’t tell you the number of losers I see with drop dead gorgeous chicks outside of the western world.

    https://gameforomegas.wordpress.com/2009/12/26/fat-women-and-the-omega/

  15. Omega Dork says:

    Stop being omegas? How do you suggest we do that?

    • Fearless says:

      1) Basic exercise. I recommend a cheap gym, but basic routines at home work (push-ups, pull-ups, bodyweight squats, sprints, etc…) Trust me, people in gyms are too worried about themselves to judge you. It really doesn’t matter where you are on the fitness scale when you begin, exercise will benefit you. Increased muscle tone and increased testosterone= better self-image.

      2) Better diet, start with small changes. Cut out soy and fast food completely.

      3) Cut down (preferably stop) on porn and masturbation.

      4) Travel like Boris said, gets you out of your head real quick

      All of the benefits to these tips are too numerous to list in a short post. I plan to elaborate on my site soon. A driving need for change is the main factor though. I enjoy your blog, all the best. -Fearless

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